I was in a certain "video shop" yesterday looking for a good movie to watch. I was actually planning to rent some comedy movies but then one CD caught my eyes. It was "The Notebook". I was really trying to rent it before since one of my friends told me that it was a great film but I always forgot to do so. So there, I had my chance to finally watch it today.

Well, indeed it was a great film. It's not trite compare to those crappy old romantic movies. It was serious but still not boring. I honestly like it.

So now, I'm once again deeply romantic. Like, hell, I wanna fall in love again --- with the right person this time. The movie just made me realize how wonderful it is to fall in love.

I do salute the man's (Noah) love for the girl (Allie). He even sacrificed his time, effort and family just to be with her. He never loosed hope that someday, somehow, she'll remember him again by reading their love story that she wrote in the notebook.

They both showed love. Love which is forever --- undying. Love which means waiting. Love which stands for what is right. Love that has no boundaries. Love which is true and deep.

The film really do made my day. It even touched me when they died in bed together in the last scene.

I'm also looking forward on the day when I'll find that right girl to whom I will give all my love and life. I just don't know when, where or how. But I know it'll come…

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on 3:44 PM
2 Thoughts

I was in our store this afternoon when the phone rang. On the line was Christina, my grandparent's hired helper, speaking with an unusual tone. I knew something bad had happened. I just didn’t expect that it was worst than I thought. She told me that my grandfather's heartbeat turned 0. She told me he's dead.

Actually yesterday, I even went to the hospital to see my grandfather. He was already in the ICU for several days. We went there since Christina told us that the doctors already spoke to my grandmother and to my dad and advised them to be ready for whatever that might happen to my grandfather. With the doctor's advice, we were sure that papang (we all call my grandfather papang) was in his last days. But then, mamang, my grandmother, was still strong and still kept on believing that papang will be able to survive his illness and get better. She didn't like what the doctor said. She kept on hoping that papang will get stronger everyday. However, my dad knew that papang's condition is getting worst than ever.

When mamang asked me to come and go to the ICU with her to see papang, I followed her without hesitation. After we entered the ICU, mamang talked to papang in "chabacano" language which I really didn't understand. But then, I knew that mamang was telling papang to wake up and breathe deeply because of her actions. And then, I talked to papang and told him he should get better soon and then we will eat all the things he always wanted. After that, I said goodbye which turned out to be my last words to him.

When we went out the ICU, I saw my father in the chair with a very long face. I honestly didn't know what to tell him. I can't tell him that it’s ok 'cause it's really not ok, that if papang wants to go, we should let him, that papang will be happier in the spirit world, and other things that I really wanted to tell him but I can't since that’s his dad… he doesn't want him to leave us. So I just sat beside my father. We didn't even talk. There was a very long silence until my mom showed up with mamang asking me to go home.

And now, papang is dead. Mamang is really mourning and is getting very emotional. She even said that papang is not happy now since she wasn't able to come with him. She also said that she really wants to go with him. But dad, I know he really doesn't worry much. Yes, he lost his father but it's only for this time. My dad has a great knowledge and faith about the gospel of Jesus Christ and that what's helping him to accept papang's death. He knows what Heavenly Father's plans for us are. My dad even told mamang that we shouldn't question God's decisions for His plans are perfect and good.

Right now, I have mixed emotions for this sad event. Although somehow I do feel sorrowful, it's still ok for me that he is now living peacefully since I know he already suffered much here with his illness and that he really need to go now as part of our Heavenly Father's plan. I also know that someday, we will all meet up again as whole family and will live together eternally.

I really don't consider death as a dreadful thing. Death is just a trial for everyone. It's just a test to us to know if we can live without someone in our lives. Also, death is just a short time separation since we will meet again someday.

In closing, I want to share what Morrie commented about death... "Death ends a life, not a relationship."

We will miss you Papang!

on 10:24 PM
1 Thoughts

I went to school (the one where I studied high school) yesterday since our adviser last year asked us to help her do some cleaning because it’s "Brigada Eskwela" this week. Honestly I wasn’t really willing to go but then I remembered that I haven’t got my diploma yet. So I had no choice but to go there.

As I went upstairs to our room, I suddenly heard a familiar scream... "Gwapo!". I easily recognized that those were my classmates screaming. Hell! I missed that label. Only 50 persons call me that. And they're my beloved classmates.

After I heard them call me, I hurriedly went downstairs again since they were all in Science Building and not in our old room. Then I hastily helped them cover some old visuals and diorama 'cause I thought our last year adviser will give me my diploma as soon as I finish my work. But then she didn't give it right away for some reasons I really don’t know. So I had a very long time to chat with my classmates again.

It's great seeing them all again. Well, not all actually since some weren't able to come. But those that were there yesterday, I really had so much fun talking and laughing with them again like the old times. Oh man! I really missed those times when we will all just talk and laugh together until our next subject teacher comes. The topics were really not important as long as it's funny and we all know it. Haha... it’s such a good feeling remembering those stuffs.

Wow...now I really miss them all. I do miss all the wacky stuffs we usually, all the jokes, the games, the talk...everything!

Before leaving the school, I looked at our old classroom. It made me smile. It reminded me that it's the place where I spent almost 12 hours of my life 5 days a week with the people I learned to love as my own family.

Now we will live our separate lives again but I'm sure we'll all... I mean ALL... meet again after 10 years. That's our promise. We will keep it.

on 5:39 PM
2 Thoughts

"To me a lush carpet of pine needles or spongy grass is more welcome than the most luxurious Persian rug."

-Hellen Keller

Have you ever gone outside one night just to stare at those glittering stars? Have you ever played in the street while the rain is pouring on you and felt happy? Have you ever walked under a cherry blossom tree and got amazed by the leaves that fell on you?

On the first two, I did! It’s a simple thing but then those simple things made me happy in times when I’m disappointed or feeling down. And the third one is my wish. I’m really looking forward on that day when I’ll be able to go to Japan and be amazed by that lovely tree.

I’m such a nature lover. Nature gives me the joy, the love, the peace and the hope I need. I can’t even imagine life without it.

Isn’t it wonderful to have these beautiful things around us? Even those little things like the raindrops on your face, the songs of the birds, the rainbow in the sky or the grass in your feet make the world a better place to live in.

I’m truly happy that Heavenly Father has given us this nature we have now. It always reminds me of He’s great love for us.

[Along with this post, I wanna share you a children’s song that inspired me to write this entry. It’s entitled “Heavenly Father Loves Me”]

Whenever I hear the song of a bird
Or look at the blue, blue sky
Whenever I feel the rain on my face
Or the wind as it rushes by
Whenever I touch a velvet rose
Or walk by a lilac tree
I’m glad that I live in this beautiful world
Heave’ly Father created for me

He gave me my eyes that I might see
The colors of butterfly wings
He gave me ears that I might hear
The magical sound of things
He gave my heart, my mind, my life
I thank Him reverently
With all these creations which I am a part
Yes I know Heave’ly Father loves me

on 2:48 PM
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on 7:20 PM
5 Thoughts