I'll be remembering you always and forever

Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Run away

"Letting go doesn't mean giving up, but rather accepting that there are things that cannot be."

another minute spent thinking about you.

i just want my thoughts of you to stop.

______________________________________________________________

Photo by:
ChaosBang
"The Tired Writer"

Labels: Life, Love

Nhil on 2:33 PM

Friday, September 18, 2009
I am an Island

"At this moment there are 6,470,818,671 people in the world [...] Six billion people in the world, six billion souls. And sometimes... all you need is one."

- One Tree Hill

I'm so tired of being alone.

Where are you?

______________________________________________________________

Photo by:
valyeszter
"Alone"

Labels: Life, Love

Nhil on 5:56 PM

Thursday, August 20, 2009
The flames of my candles are dying

Sometimes I wish i had never met you. Because then i could go to sleep at night not knowing there was someone like you out there.
- Good Will Hunting

I can't do this anymore.

Photo by:
Mystic200
"Dead End"

Labels: Life, Love

Nhil on 3:25 PM

Friday, August 14, 2009
Hello Wednesday!

“It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return, but what is the most painful is to love someone and never find the courage to let the person know how you feel.”

I will no longer hold my words.
I will no longer keep my secret.

I want you.

_______________________________________________________________

Photo by:
Tracie76

"Speak Your Mind"

Labels: Choices, Courage, Life, Love

Nhil on 11:34 AM

Tuesday, December 9, 2008
When life starts to change big time

"Any change, even a change for the better, is always accompanied by drawbacks and discomforts."
- Arnold Bennett

It's been quite a long time since I last posted an entry here. I never even thought that I would be here again, sitting in front of my computer, wanting to relive the things that had happened over the last 8 months of my life. And to tell you honestly, I miss blogging.

Before I start storytelling about my life here, I would first want to let you know that I was (and still am, actually) really, really surprised to see how much things had changed here (the blog-o-sphere, I mean). The first thing I noticed is that, those bloggers that I used to know changed how they write. Some changed from writing life stories to just posting poems and photos- which made me not interested anymore. Another thing is, most of the links on my blogroll no longer exist. Oh boy! That is truly sad. I miss reading their beautifully written blogs. They used to inspire me. I’m now hoping that they just changed their blog URLs and I would be able to find their blogs once again.

Talking about changes, I too had experience and still is experiencing a lot of them in my life since last summer up to now. Let me enumerate them:

1. I didn't attend summer classes (which I should have attended) but instead chose to go to Singapore so that I could relax and forget all about the bad things that had happened- which made me an irregular student for the rest of my college life.

2. I auditioned for Teatro Tomasino, the University-wide theater guild in UST, and was given the name YOO for some reason I don't want to tell anymore because it was a dumb story (seriously). I was then asked to join their first major production for this year as a part of their requirements for membership. Eventually, I got assigned to be both an Assistant Stage Manager and an actor to the play "Fuente Ovejuna" directed Mr. Dennis Marasigan – which gave me sleepless nights, no time to study, and made me went home late (around 1-2 AM). But don't get me wrong, the experience I had is still unforgettable and amazing.

3. I quitted participating in Teatro Tomasino's production. (Does failing Calculus not a good reason enough?)

4. I lost my best friend in a My-Best-Friend's-Wedding-kind of way (except for the "wedding" part). Gotta start singing "I'll Be Okay" by Amanda Marshall, I guess.

NOTE: I'll just blog this stuff next time 'cause I don't feel like telling it now. I guess I’m still not over her.

5. I did something horrible that I never thought I could ever do in my entire life. And you know what? It made me unable to function for a week.

6. I'm not that optimistic anymore.

7. I feel more alone these days.

8. I don't think I write as good as I used to.

Changes... changes... changes...

Those things I have mentioned are just a part of the looooong list. Unfortunately, most of those are not so good changes. But then I wonder, don't all of those changes also made me a much stronger person? Did they happen because I needed to learn something? And, don't I deserve those changes?

_______________________________________________________________

Photo by:
Aksicnn
"Green Green Grass"

Labels: Change, Choices, Life, Love, Optimism, Problems, School, Teatro

Nhil on 9:47 PM

Treasured Experience

September 30, 2008

"There's no substitute for experience."

Fuente Ovejuna (Teatro Tomasino's First Major Production this year) had already ended last night. And man! The feeling that it gave me was priceless.

I never really expected it to be that fun. It gave me that nice feeling i never had since I returned in school. We rehearsed the play for almost three months and I can say that the result is really, really worth it.

I used to say that maybe I won't ever love Teatro as much as the other members already do. I also used to wonder why they stay/ed in an organization when all it gives you are stress, depression and sleepless nights. But then, yesterday, I understood. I now know why many Teatro members love and sacrifice almost everything for it.

To our director, Sir Dennis Marasigan, thank you so much for the lessons you taught us. Thank you so much for bringing out the best in us. We will truly never forget you. Because of you, we are now not just better actors and actresses but also better persons. Thank you so much for the love that you showed us.

To Ate JS, I would like to thank you for teaching us the value of work and time. Thank you for teaching us the importance of keeping our promises and how to be punctual (the hard slap you gave me is really unforgettable. haha)

To Kuya Owa, my head, our Stage Manager, thank you for teaching us the importance of sacrifice. Thank you for the late-night meetings we had, i enjoyed every bits of it. Thank you too for being a true person.

To the whole production staffs, thank you for the wonderful and memorable production. I truly enjoyed it. We worked so hard and the result, like what i said, is worth it.

I love you people! I love TEATRO TOMASINO! :]

Labels: Friends, Happiness, Life, School, Teatro

Nhil on 9:12 PM

Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Trust me, this is true

"To be trusted is a greater compliment than being loved."

- George MacDonald

I was watching a TV series earlier and there was this scene where the two leads are on the top of a building, standing on the edge as if they were going to jump off. The scene suddenly changed, showing the two leads embracing each other, moving slowly to avoid any unwanted circumstances that might happen (like falling off the building). So yeah, you can call it a romantic moment. However, my mind is not on that lovely view (as some might call it) but on to that thought that they might actually fall if they'll just move one more step onto that edge. I'm acrophobic so that scene was honestly breathtaking for me. I was scared to death as if I'm one of the leads there. And then I wondered, how did they manage to do such scene. Why did they allow themselves to do a life-threatening act? But eventually, I was also the one who answered my question. I told myself that surely they trust each other that no one between them will ever do a crazy move while standing up there. And most probably, they also trusted their director whom they know will never let anything bad happen to them. So there, I realized that it was all about trust. Trust which made two people do something acrophobic folks are afraid of.

"When mistrust comes in, love goes out."

-Irish Sayings

Survivor, which for me is one of the greatest reality shows that were ever made, deals greatly about trust. In that game, trust is something you should not easily give since it may cause you to get voted off the game. In the other hand, it can also be one of the reasons that could make you win the title of being the "sole survivor". Because of this, many contestants find it hard to choose whether they would trust someone or not. Though many still decides to try and believe that it is the best thing to do.

Last Friday's episode of Survivor is a clear example of giving out trust to someone who doesn't deserve it. Jason, the person I was rooting to win, got voted off the show. He too, like Ozzy, got blindsided thinking that Natalie was his trusted alliance. Again, another great player got outwitted.

It was both nice and stupid for Jason to trust her. Nice since he gave her a chance of being trusted though he barely knows her. And stupid 'cause he didn't learn any lesson from Ozzy's experience.

With what Ozzy and Jason experienced, I now wonder how many times in our lives we actually have done the same thing; trusting people who in return just cause us to regret our decision of giving them our trust.

"Trust no one unless you have eaten much salt with him."

-Cicero

I was in fourth year high school when I experienced being back stabbed by the people I once trusted. I never really thought they could tell everybody something I trusted them not to tell. It was awful. Though I must say that it hurt me a lot, I still forgave them for what they have done. But of course, something must change. After that, I told myself not to trust anyone easily anymore unless he/she truly deserves it.

"Love all, trust a few."

-William Shakespeare

Trust is a beautiful thing. It's what people mostly need in this unsure life. Once it's lost, you can hardly give or acquire it again. Trust people who you know will always be there for you, who will never let you go no matter what. And in return, never fail someone who trusts you so much.

Photo by:

Hoplesss
"Hold me BRO"

Labels: Forgiveness, Life, Phobia, School, Trust, TV Contests, TV Series

Nhil on 12:14 PM

Friday, April 18, 2008
Unscripted

One thing I love about summer is that I could watch every TV show and movie that I missed during school days. It’s pretty much the best time for a couch potato to do his thing from morn ‘til night.

Though some people think that it is dumb to waste your time watching TV shows and movies, I still do believe that it helps me a lot. Those shows inspire me. They entertain me. Especially reality shows.

In line with this entry, I would like to post here two of the reality shows that’s quite addictive for me: Survivor and American Idol.

I can say that this season, Survivor: Micronesia – Fans vs Favorites, is one of my favorite Survivor installments. I never really thought it would interest me and make me go craving for another episode since the last two seasons didn't fascinate me that much. But surprisingly as the show goes on, it's becoming more and more interesting.

The only thing that sucks now is that two of my top favorites, Jonathan Penner and Eliza Orlins, already left the show. Jonathan was removed due to a said to be fatal injury that he got during an immunity challenge and Eliza got voted off for having a weak alliance and for playing the fake idol Ozzy made.

But anyway, there's still Jason and Amanda whom I can root for. Jason since he is more likely the nicest guy in the game now and because he has a great potential on winning immunity challenges. Also, he was the last alliance of Eliza who is, like what I said earlier, my favorite gal in this season. And Amanda because she is loyal and honest.

Honestly right now, I'm really, really ecstatic. I think this week is the best week in Survivor Micronesia since Oscar "Ozzy" Lusth got finally voted out. YEAH! Even though he had the real idol, he wasn't able to play it since he thought he was safe. Meaning, he got blindsided. And this is because of Parvati's great plan, though I must admit that I also don't like her because she's the reason why Eliza got voted off. Well anyway, (just for now) hurrah to Parv!

Ozzy at first is really cool. As a matter of fact, I was a fan of him during the start of this season. He used to be a great guy; he's strong, smart and played the game very well. However, as time went by, he became obnoxious and arrogant. I also recently found out that he did porn for playboy before which... made me really not a fan of him anymore.

Now, I'm really excited what would happen and who would go next week. I'm guessing it'll be James for he is a big threat. But i don't know, maybe they'll gonna surprise us again and vote somebody whom we don't expect to be voted off.

Aside from Ozzy being voted out, another thing that made this week a "great reality show" week is that Kristy Lee Cook (at long last) got eliminated. Yehey!

I honestly don't hate Kristy but I just don't want her to stay longer there now. I just think that the others who got eliminated deserve to stay longer than she did. Especially Michael Johns. And talking about Michael... Oh man! I was really shocked and surprised when I read from Yahoo! that Michael got eliminated. Michale Johns elimination was as surprising as Clay Aiken and Chris Daughtry's.

With only six contestants left, it's quite hard to choose among them for they are all good. But I guess I'm into Brooke White, Carly Smithson and David Cook since I believe they have the greatest, unique voices this season.

Photo by:
Prawninator
"Potato"

Labels: TV Contests

Nhil on 8:51 PM

Monday, March 31, 2008
Our search for Happiness

"We all live with the objective of being happy; our lives are all different and yet the same."

-Anne Frank

One thing I'm very sure about people is that, everyone in this world wants to be happy. Of course we do. Who doesn't? We usually do every possible way to find that happiness that will make our lives better and more colorful. We try new things, make new things or look for new things.

However, sometimes we do unnecessary things that we think are the best to feel happy although the truth is, they will just drown us into the depths of disappointment and sorrow. Also, there are times in our lives when we, ourselves, are the one who do not realize that we could actually feel happy every time... if we just allow ourselves to.

In our Guidance Office in school, there is a wall where you could write anything (by using post-its) that would make you happy. I think it's made so that we could actually think about what we really want in our lives. And by knowing what those are, we could eventually think of present and future actions that we need to make in order for those things to happen. I can't exactly remember what I wrote in there for the first time but I think it's shallow since I took it off away after a few weeks. But after that, I wrote there again something that at least much better than the first. I wrote, "Finding my Princess". As a result, our Guidance Adviser asked me if I already found her. But obviously I said I still haven't since that's the truth. Then my classmates looked at me. They were surprised to read something like that from me. Yeah, I don't really talk about that thing. I mean, love. Well, I do talk about it but only occasionally. But that time, I guess I just really wrote there the truth. That finding my future eternal companion will make me happy.

"How many times do we look for our happiness at a distance in
space or time rather than right now, in our own homes, with our own families and friends."
-James E. Faust

Have you ever heard the story about Ali Hafed? The man who used to be one of the wealthiest Persian but sold all his possessions because of his search for a precious gem?

The story goes like this…

There was a man named Ali Hafed. He owned many lands in Persia. He was really wealthy and rich. He also has a lovely family that makes him feel everything is perfect in his life.

One day, there was an old priest who came and spoke to Ali. He told Ali that if he'll be able to find a diamond as big as his thumb in a river full of white sands, he will surely get richer.

So, Ali then sold all his possessions to travel around the world to look for that diamond and even left his family with his neighbor's care.

Ali traveled for many years but was unable to find what he was looking for. He suffered a lot of pain and suffereings during his travel.

Meanwhile, the man whom bought Ali's lands went walking with his camel one day to Ali's old garden. While letting his camel to drink in the stream, he suddenly was surprised to see something glittering below the water. He reached for it and saw a very beautiful gem. Later, it was revealed that it was the gem Ali was looking for all his life.

If only Ali didn't travel around the world and sold his possession, he could have been more rich and wealthy than before.

The story tells us much about what's happening in our world today. Sometimes, we try to look for something far from us just to achieve the happiness we want. Unfortunately, what we don't realize is that, the things that could actually make us feel the true happiness are already in front of us. These are our family, our friends, and the gospel and love of God.

"Happiness is the object and design of our existence; and will be the end thereof, if we pursue the path that leads to it; and this path is virtue, uprightness, faithfulness, holiness, and keeping all the commandments of God"

-Joseph Smith

Since the beginning of time, God has this wonderful plan for all of us. He calls it the Plan of Happiness. But because of our choices, we often times do not receive the blessings of this said plan. Now, what we should only do is to direct ourselves in the right path in order to gain that happiness. And this is by being obedient to the commandments of the Lord.

"The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of
everything. They just make the best of everything."

-Martin Seligan

Being happy isn't really that hard. In fact, there are lots of things that could make us feel the joy. Some of these are just simple things like being with the people we love, seeing the innocent faces and smiles of babies, listening to uplifting music, praying every time and feeling that God is always there to guide us and help us and many more.

We don't need to be one of the most successful men or women in history just to be happy. We just need to be optimistic and appreciate the littlest things.

See the best in everything. Make the best in everything as the quote above says. If we do these, we will surely adore life.

Like the cliche goes, happiness is a choice. It's only we who could help ourselves be happy whatever life brings.

_______________________________________________________________

Photo by:
MotyPest
"Laugh and Tears"

Labels: Choices, God, Happiness, Life, Optimism

Nhil on 8:52 PM

Friday, March 14, 2008
Beautiful, with or without them

"There are always challenges at every stage in our life, overcoming them is what life is all about"

- Dr. N. Sai Bhaskar Reddy

I bet nobody could ever say that life is easy. Because in fact, life is pretty much full of trials, problems, temptations and hardships. And often times, we find ourselves confuse and troublesome for what life brings.

As we get older, we realize that life is not all about candies, toys and cartoons. That every day won't be a sunny day. And that crying is really not the best solution if we want something.

Life is really not simple as we thought it was. However, life is also not that difficult especially if we do our best in everything we do.

"Life kicks you around sometimes. It scares you and it beats you up. But there's one day when you realize you're not just a survivor. You're a fighter. You're tougher than anything life throws your way. And you are."

- One Tree Hill

It has been said that there's always something that could ruin the moments in our lives. But I guess it's still in our hands if we're going to allow it to destroy us. We always have the power to be joyful, even if a situation itself is sorrowful.

There are times in our lives when we wish that in the future, we'll have days without problems and trials. However, what we don't realize is that these said difficulties that we experience are in fact, helpful to us. We just don't see how they make us a better person. This is because these troubles make us stronger. They cause us to be conscious that we are braver and tougher than we think we are. And lastly, they help us appreciate the happiest moments in our lives.

"We will encounter problems for the rest of our lives but there will be nothing we can't manage."

- Jay McGraw

If we just look at the brighter side, we could see that life is really beautiful, with or without problems.

Labels: Beauty, Life, Optimism, Problems

Nhil on 7:52 AM

Name:
Query:

Wednesday, October 21, 2009 Run away

Friday, September 18, 2009 I am an Island

Thursday, August 20, 2009 The flames of my candles are dying

Friday, August 14, 2009 Hello Wednesday!

Tuesday, December 9, 2008 When life starts to change big time

Treasured Experience

Tuesday, April 29, 2008 Trust me, this is true

Friday, April 18, 2008 Unscripted

Monday, March 31, 2008 Our search for Happiness

Friday, March 14, 2008 Beautiful, with or without them

Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Run away

Friday, September 18, 2009
I am an Island

Thursday, August 20, 2009
The flames of my candles are dying

Friday, August 14, 2009
Hello Wednesday!

Tuesday, December 9, 2008
When life starts to change big time

Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Trust me, this is true

Friday, April 18, 2008
Unscripted

Monday, March 31, 2008
Our search for Happiness

Friday, March 14, 2008
Beautiful, with or without them